By Melissa L. Webb
It’s not like they say it is. There is no romance. There are no sparkles. There is only death. I know this for a fact. My world has changed around me and it is entirely my own doing. I wanted this. I thought I needed it…but I was wrong.
Life has not been kind to me. I wasn’t one of those people who seemed to luck into everything they have. I had to take everything I owned, work for it until my soul bled. There wasn’t much left of me at the end of the day, but at least I had earned a little in this world. Something I could call mine.
But for as much ground as I conquered, there were things that were still off limits to me. I couldn’t find the one. I was incurably single in a world that demanded families. So that was my lot; no spouse, no children. No one to share my accomplishments with at the end of the day. I was doomed to walk this life alone.
At least there was no one there to mourn when the cancer struck. No one had to wait at my bedside, watching me waste away as the disease ate at my savaged body. I was spared that. I didn’t have to watch my loved one’s faces as my chances of survival grew less and less.
That night I checked myself out of the hospital, I remember clearly the shape I was in. I wouldn’t last another week, they all told me. I didn’t want to die in a cold hospital room. I couldn’t. I would not spend my last moments on this Earth staring at sterile, white walls and listening to the horrid cacophony of machines.
I left the hospital on foot, not caring where I went as long as it got me far away from that place. Staggering down back alleys, I was in search for somewhere I could curl up and die, going out as I lived my life, unnoticed.
As I stumbled farther from civilization, I realized I was being followed. I had to laugh. How dumb must my would-be mugger be if they couldn’t see I had nothing to offer? I was little more than rags and bones.
I kept moving forward. I knew if I stopped, I might not ever start again. My unknown assailant kept following, moving closer and closer with each step. I knew any moment would be my last and I welcomed it. Maybe life had finally become kind and I wouldn’t have to suffer a minute more. A death at some punk’s hand would be a blessing.
My pace slowed, my body too far gone to keep going. I didn’t have the spirit to fight it. I wanted to die. I turned and waited for the aggressor, ready to spur him into action. What approached stopped me cold, the creature’s dark red eyes pinned me where I was.
I watched as it moved closer, my mind whirling in the understanding of it. It wore the look of a man, but I could almost see the monster underneath. It smiled at me, pure predatory in intent, baring its fangs for me to see. Air passed my lips in shock as I realized the stories were true. Monsters roamed the night and preyed on the weak.
It moved closer, ready to strike, but no fear filled me. Only one world filtered through my thoughts as I looked at it. Salvation. This thing could save me. If I could get it to change me and make me one of its own, I would live forever. I would be stronger, better. I would be freed from this hell my body had become.
“Please,” I begged it. “Turn me. I want to be a Vampire, too.”
The creature who looked like a man laughed as it watched me, humor in its undead eyes. It moved and was upon me in an instant, fangs piercing my paper-thin flesh. The thing finished me right there, among the scattered remained of last week’s garbage. It left me there; a smile on his crimson-coated lips was the last thing my human eyes saw.
The change came upon me quickly, turning me into an undead being. I had achieved what I wanted. The cancer would not claim me. I wish to God now that it had.
I have been transformed into a state of perpetual decaying. My body will never die, yet it will not heal. That’s the real truth about being a vampire. You never change from what you were. You are a moment frozen it time; a homage to what you were at the time of your death. So now, my body is forever riddled with cancer. I suffer in agony, staying suspended in my pain. And I will stay like this. Forever.
© 2011 Melissa L. Webb